School Scares Me

I think I have an unhealthy obsession with school. When I was hit by a Land Rover in March, and was taken to the emergency room, they asked why I was crying. Pain? Fear? My answer: “I’m g-g-going to g-g-get s-s-so beh-h-ind on my r-r-research!”

Then thyroid surgery yesterday: while moving me from the OR to the recovery room, the surgeons said I started to stir, opened my eyes and said, “Ohh!! I thought I’d fallen asleep in class!”

Now maybe this is merely a way to avoid thinking about the various medical disasters that have befallen me this year. On the other hand, perhaps it reveals a not-very-well-hidden aspect of my psyche: graduate school matters to me. A lot. And apparently falling asleep in class and getting behind on my research are the major concerns that pop up when my verbal defenses are down…

The surgery itself went well, and the Vicodin is keeping most of the pain at bay. B’s home-made pizza is also helping. And naps. Lots of naps. I’ve already taken two and I’ve only been home 9 hours. I think I deserve some congratulations for this feat. Thank you.

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