Me: Can you help me pick up your toys by bringing me the red block that’s on the floor?
LLF: (hands me a red mitten).
Me: Thank you. That is a red mitten. Can you bring me the red block? It’s right next to your foot.
LLF: (hands me a red lentil).
Me: Yes, thank you. I’m so glad you found that red lentil. But I would like the red block. In fact, there are two red blocks near you. Either will do.
LLF: (goes and gets the red lentil, and re-hands it to me).
Me: Yes, okay. Red lentils are kind of like red legos. Both are red, and both start with “L”, so… thanks?
Me (while reading aloud a book about barnyard animals): LLF, what’s that? (points to pig).
LLF: (stares at pig. stares at me.)
Me: I know you can say PIG, you said pig when a truck drove by outside that had a pig painted on the side. What is this animal? What does it say?
LLF (stares at me while clearly thinking): You and I both know you know that’s a pig. Why are you asking me questions to which you already know the answer? You also know that pigs say “Oink”. So stop wasting my time and turn to the page with the dog on it.
Me: It’s a PIG! Pigs say OINK!
LLF: (gives me a look of disdain and turns the page to the dog)